BORDER BUSTERS

Here’s to the people in my life who have supported me in important ways.

POLLY
Polly is my sister who is 21 months younger than I am and we couldn’t be more opposite. She was an athlete. I was a cheerleader. She has sandy brown hair and blue eyes. I have dark brown hair and brown eyes. She attended a four-year college and earned a degree in journalism. I went to a business school and opted for marriage at the age of 20. You get the picture. We never really fought but we never really bonded either.

Our bonding didn’t come until we both had been through a divorce—and my second marriage fell apart. At that time she stepped up to become my prayer partner through emails and weekly phone conversations. We were finally in a place where we understood each other. We shared things about our upbringing and found that common bond that had been missing.

She is there when I need her even though she’s halfway across the country. I love the fact that we can pick up where we left off no matter how long it’s been since we spoke last. I appreciate her resolute honesty and the spiritual aspect from which she offers advice. She encourages me as a writer and she reminds me that being single is not a horrible condition.

DARA
My relationship with Dara started about 11 years ago as co-leaders for a Girl Scout troop when our daughters were in the second grade. Dara’s personality is very different from mine. She is grounded, needs all the facts, and states her opinion resolutely. You never wonder where you stand with her.

When my first marriage ended, Dara followed me into the second one and we remained friends outside of the co-leading duties. We lost touch for about a year as we both were going through some transitions in our lives. But, we found each other again when I started attending Hope Church in June 2005. Dara was there for me as my second marriage failed right before her eyes. She encourages me to be the woman that God designed me to be and to rely on Him for my happiness and not to seek my identity in others.

ALINDA
My relationship with Alinda has been a strange and only explained by ‘it’s a God thing.” During the time I dated and was married to her cousin, we shared dislike for each other. It wasn’t until I started attending Hope and discovered she did too, that we began to bond.

She saw something in me that others didn’t. She approached me to join her and start my own Arbonne business. While, I have chosen not to continue that path at the moment, I believe her insight and ability to lead me for a moment in time was life giving. She stood beside me as she watched the marriage between me and her cousin fall apart despite her knowing the reason. She chose to overlook my faults and see that I was a changing woman. Together we have learned much and I believe the bond will stand strong.

MARIANNE
Marianne and I met while serving together as waitresses back in 2002. It took us a moment, but we figured out that we are soul mates. Over the next three years somehow we ended up working together in various jobs. But, the most important aspect of our relationship is that she stuck by me through the worst time in my life.

Now, Marianne will tell you herself that she is a people pleaser. While I cannot and do not blame her for my actions, she did encourage me to exercise my options for happiness. She has since told me that she learned a lesson from that time in our lives. Being honest with your friends is more important than just making sure they are happy.

She is the one I laugh hysterically with at the same time we are crying. I can count on her to tell me the truth. She is the first person I call when I need someone to catch my excitement. She doesn’t shy away from the plethora of ideas and schemes I bring to the table. Marianne has crossed the border with me and facilitates my dreams where she is able.

JOE
Joe and I started dating in March. Last month we decided to continue our relationship on a friendship level. He is definitely a great team member. Okay…he might sing too much or need adult supervision at times (his own words). But, he is one of the most generous and encouraging people in my life. Many of his qualities are what I am looking for in a mate. But, being friends will work for me.

He knows how to speak my language with words of affirmation which are not forced or awkward. He is a good listener and gives honest feedback. He is creative himself and understands the power in creativity. And he supports my dream of writing in a concrete way. He is the catalyst getting my book out of my head and on paper.