BROKEN LEGS OR A BROKEN HEART?

As I read through the Old Testament book of Amos, I am consistently reminded of what walking away from God does to a person…and to God. It makes the person hard hearted and it both saddens and angers God.

Israel had fallen into idol worship and taking advantage of the poor while they sat comfortable in their abundance never giving thought to the needs of others. And God chose to punish them for their actions.

When I walked away from God forgetting what he had done for me and believing I could not trust him to run my life the way I wanted it to be run, I am certain it both angered and saddened him. But, God never let go of me.

God allowed my circumstances to bring me to a point of a real relationship with him. As my first marriage stood on the rocks, he placed me in a job where I was surrounded by loving, caring Christians who showed me who I really am. I remained in the marriage and worked on becoming the woman God created me to be. I lay on my floor at night and cried as I prayed for transformation for my husband, the marriage and me. This continued for three years until I finally caved in and gave up from the exhaustion of experiencing little change—or so I thought.

Then I began to walk away forgetting what God had done for me. I believed that I could handle it all better myself. My husband and I divorced and this is when I sprinted from God…even though I remained in the church for the sake of my children.

As I walked away, little things began to happen which I ignored. God was wooing me back. But, I wouldn’t listen. The guilt ate away at me.

I stepped into a second marriage to a man who did not share my faith. And bigger trials surrounded me as I lost three jobs and a chasm grew between us. Neither of us were standing on a firm foundation and it all crumbled as I turned to alcohol to numb the pain.

Eventually my husband asked me for a divorce and I began to lose everything—my marriage, my home, my children, my job, my friends. And that’s when I felt him break my legs (not literally) so I couldn’t run anymore.

With no way to run, I realized that all he wanted was my heart…broken for him. Instead I got two broken legs in the process. Before he has to break your legs, let your heart be broken for him…and the things of God.