THE "S" WORD

Over the past few days, I have found myself in various discussions all revolving around the "s" word--you know...the one that makes many women's skin crawl at the sound of it: submission. Yet, I find a paradox in being a strong, independent single woman who actually craves submission. Now, before you send the guys to whisk me off to the padded room...let me explain.

I crave the kind of intimacy and understanding it takes to build a mutually submissive relationship with another human being...not just within a marriage. When I follow the biblical description of submission, there are a few things which are brought to my life.

Relief. There is a sense of relief knowing I have come underneath a safe place. For it is in this safe place that I can ask the questions and find the answers. I find wise direction. I relax knowing that I don't have to be in control. There is freedom here.

Trust. As I learn to listen and view things from another perspective, I trust more each time that someone else truly cares about my desires. Trusting God has not come easy for me even though I seem to be a trusting person otherwise. I found myself in a controling marriage and submission meant throwing away my desires and needs. But, in submission to God I am learning to trust again.

Love. Obedience opens the door to receive love. I struggle with making the right choice out of selfish desire at times. When I finally let go and obey is where I experience love. The feel good feeling comes from knowing I've made the right choice--the one God provides.

Respect. There was a time that I thought respect had to be earned before it could be given...especially toward my unbelieving husband. But, I have since learned that those people we love become what we believe about them. Therfore, when I put the respect foot forward, the rest follows.

These are the fundemental building blocks of relationship. When we practice breath-by-breath submission to God, we can establish the kind of lasting relationships--marriage or otherwise--that God intended.